Is It Ever OK to Pick Someone Else's Flowers? The Internet Has Thoughts

Your neighbor has a yard full of gorgeous flowers. What's the harm in snipping a few blossoms to take home? If you haven’t asked your neighbor and gotten permission, picking their flowers is peak rudeness. That’s the consensus on Reddit, where people often post their quandaries to crowdsource ethics. And they had some astonishing stories to share about the brazen flower bandits they've encountered.

Pinching the Neighbor's Flowers

A Redditor in Portland, Oregon, was so incensed after they saw someone picking a neighbor’s flowers that they started a thread on the matter. “Don’t be the woman I saw this morning who waited around the block for my neighbor to leave their house just so that she could cut a bouquet of their flowers,” the Redditor wrote.

Other gardeners chimed in, agreeing that flower filchers are a problem. “My husband caught a woman cutting our roses this past week,” a Redditor wrote. “She was trying to be sneaky about it, but he was watching her through the window. As she went to cut a stem, he banged really hard on the window…. She literally ran away. This is why we can't have nice things.”

Another Redditor wrote in a thread about pilfered petals that “a neighbor near me had to move their peonies because people kept cutting their flowers.” And another Redditor wrote “We all prepare for deer, birds, squirrels, aphids, and various pests—it’s annoying that we often need to factor in people as well.”

A Thorny Legal Issue

Picking flowers from a private yard isn’t just bad manners. It’s also against the law. “Legally, the picking of another’s flowers without permission could be charged as theft or criminal trespass,” says H. Maddox Kilgore, a criminal defense attorney in Marietta, Georgia. “In most instances, the pilfering of flowers from a yard would be of a minimal monetary value and therefore a misdemeanor, as opposed to a felony.” Most misdemeanors are punishable by up to 12 months in the county jail, Kilgore says.

There are nuanced situations where legal lines are blurry, like when a neighbor’s flowers overhang a public sidewalk or your yard. Even in these cases, if the plant’s roots are on private property, the flowers would belong to the landowner.

Respecting Other’s Work

Picking a neighbor’s flowers on the sly isn’t just illegal. It’s also disrespectful of others’ work, Redditors say. Gardeners invest a lot of time, energy, and money into their landscapes. Blooming flowers are the culmination of months, sometimes years, of work. Having someone take those flowers can feel quite heartbreaking.

“I know it seems harmless, but it really sucks to have the enjoyment of your work taken from you,” a Redditor wrote.

Assuming your neighbor won’t mind if you take a few flowers also can come off as entitled. A Redditor posted about looking out their window and seeing a stranger picking their garden. When they knocked on the glass and waved their arms at him to get him to stop, “he looked at me, smiled, and waved as if I had just said ‘Oh hiya friend! Feel free to help yourself to the fruits of my labor without even asking!’"

Asking Is the Key

Some owners of tempting flower gardens say it’s OK to snip off a few blooms if you ask for permission first. “Just compliment my garden. ASK ME for some flowers and I'll be so overwhelmed with pride that I'd go out and cut you a bouquet myself, wrote a Redditor.

Another Redditor agreed that asking permission is the way to go before picking someone else's flowers. “I had a neighbor come over, ring my doorbell, and ask to collect some hydrangea flowers. I happily obliged!”

Kilgore, the attorney, thinks gardeners should share their yard’s bounty. “To the neighbor blessed to have the gift of spring’s color displayed in a yard, flower box, or sidewalk, I would argue that sharing such wonder is not just a privilege, but a responsibility. Let your neighbors pick, pilfer, and enjoy.”