How Meeting the Real Jesus Turned My Faith Upside Down

Welcome to Christianity.com. I'm Todd Turner—a fundraising consultant for churches and nonprofits, and more importantly, a follower of Christ.

My life has been rooted in the church for as long as I can remember. If the church doors were open, my parents made sure we were there. Sunday mornings, Sunday nights, Wednesday nights, Vacation Bible School... I even took Bible memorization classes, competed in Bible debate, and attended a private school with daily Bible study. I was immersed in Christian culture—it surrounded me and shaped my thinking.

It all made sense to my head. I understood it intellectually. But then one day, at a camp in Oklahoma (I'm originally from Texas), something changed. A man—whose name I wish I remembered—shared the gospel with me in a way I’d never heard before. He explained sin, introduced me to the concept of grace, and the Lord tugged at my heart in a way that finally clicked.

That man led me to Christ. Even though I had already helped lead others down that same path, I realized that day I hadn’t truly walked it myself. Something shifted inside me, and it's never left. I still hope to one day thank that man in eternity.

Years later—maybe 10 or 15—I read a book that changed everything: Grace Awakening by Chuck Swindoll. It was the first book I ever read cover to cover in one sitting. It opened my eyes to what I had been feeling but couldn’t articulate. I had been carrying this weight of guilt, constantly asking, “If Christ’s yoke is supposed to be easy and light, why do I feel condemned? Why do I judge others so harshly? Why does this all feel so heavy?”

That book revealed what was going on: I was living in a cycle of sin and forgiveness, over and over, feeling trapped, and worse, I was passing that burden to others. Grace Awakening helped me realize that people had been handing me their lists, and I had been doing the same in return. But that's not what Jesus calls us to do. It was so freeing.

That moment changed my life. In an incredible twist of God's humor and providence, I eventually ended up working for Chuck Swindoll—the very man whose book had reshaped my faith. I had no idea who he was when I first picked up that book. I don’t even remember how it ended up in my hands!

Now, more than 30 years later, I help churches and nonprofits raise money to fulfill their God-sized missions. I live a life of service to the Savior who rescued me, not just from sin, but from a harsh, judgmental version of Christianity. My prayer is to extend the same grace I received to everyone I encounter, until the day He returns.

Photo Credit: SWN Design