5 Best Diners In New York City, According To A Local

Fletcher Huntley / Mashed

Nobody ever accused New York City of being relaxing. The streets are crowded, the subway is unpredictable, and the wealth gap is mind-boggling. I've lived in this beautifully dysfunctional metropolis for 15 years, and I know you can't close your doors to chaos here. It suffuses every experience, so the only thing left to do is embrace it, and what better place to do that than at a diner? I've eaten at diners across all five boroughs and consider myself a connoisseur of Greek omelets, hash browns, and all the other deliciously greasy fare these humble establishments have to offer.

Many out-of-towners don't quite understand the experience of a New York diner (a Frenchman I ate with once was completely appalled when a server asked us to vacate our table). And I get it — it can be a sensory overload, with dishes clanking, cooks yelling, coffee splashing, and servers who look visibly annoyed if you take more than five seconds to decide what kind of toast to order with your omelet.

Yet somehow, I feel deeply safe tucked in a booth at a diner, sipping cup after cup of weak coffee for as long as I'm allowed. There are some diners, however, that rise above the rest. These are eateries where the customer isn't always right, but the food is consistently hot and delicious. They are places where you get humbled by a reminder that you're part of an ecosystem of city dwellers bigger than yourself. This is my definitive list of the best diners in New York City

I won't scandalize you with all the details of my first visit to Court Square Diner in Long Island City, only that it was around 4 am, and a Greek omelet was all that stood between me and total ruin. Luckily, the business model of any 24-hour diner in New York relies on a waitstaff that won't think twice about the fact that you smell like a tequila distillery. Even at that unholy hour, there were a handful of patrons stuffed in booths, and the air was filled with the cozy sound of silverware clinking against plates. I was home.

Court Square Diner opened almost 70 years ago, and since 1991, it has been run by a pair of brothers with Greek heritage, which is reflected in the restaurant's menu. The souvlaki platter, for instance, boasts chunks of lemony chicken, pita bread, french fries, and tangy, fresh tzatziki. The diner also serves American classics, like a luscious, crunchy tuna melt (order it with cheddar!) and disco fries, a late-night staple that comes drenched in thick gravy.

Few neighborhoods in New York have suffered the botched glass and metal gentrification facelift quite like Long Island City, Queens. Much of the area has become unrecognizable since Court Square Diner first opened its doors, which, aside from the food, is what makes this diner's presence so comforting.

courtsquarediner.com
(718) 392-1222
45-30 23rd St, Long Island City, NY 11101

You may think you need to pay top dollar at some overrated New York City restaurant to spot a famous person in the wild, but in this massive manmade metropolis, I had my best celebrity sighting at La Bonbonnierre (her name rhymes with Clara Pessica Marker). Every New Yorker craves that diner-specific authenticity, even in a neighborhood as famously star-studded as the West Village in Manhattan. You can count on finding it at this greasy spoon at the bottom of 8th Avenue.

The prices on the menu have risen over the last few years as egg inflation persists, but an omelet here is still cheaper than at most restaurants in the neighborhood, and served at unfathomable speed. No sooner have you spoken the words "avocado omelet with rice and beans instead of home fries and a plain bagel and cream cheese instead of toast," than it appears before you as exactly that, as if by magic. The operation here is nothing if not efficient, so when a server comes around to take your order, be ready, and tip well.

The dining room is cramped and you may be squeezed next to strangers, a perfect moment to make friends (after you've decided what to order, of course). And if it's a nice day outside, the sidewalk in front of La Bonbonnierre is some of the city's best real estate for people watching.

Instagram.com/labonbonnierenyc
(212) 741-9266
28 8th Ave, New York, NY 10014

Fletcher Huntley / Mashed

Of all the diners on this list, my love for B&H Dairy runs the deepest. This was my first New York diner, and the first place in the city where I knew the waitstaff by name (Leo, if you're reading this, you make the world's best tuna melt and you know it). Located just a half a block away from the tattoo parlors and souvenir shops on St. Marks Place in the East Village, the whole restaurant is barely wider than a hallway, and you often have to shimmy sideways past customers seated at the lunch counter to get to your table.

Once you get there, you're in diner heaven. The Greek omelet is absolutely stuffed with spinach, tomato, and tangy feta cheese and comes with a mountain of piping hot hash browns and two slices of fresh, homemade challah. Adventurous egg lovers can try the apple and cheddar omelet, which, frankly, isn't for me, but some people swear by it. The highlight of the lunch menu is the rotating list of soups (the borscht, matzo ball, and split pea are the best) and Eastern European specialties like pierogies and blintzes. The restaurant is entirely kosher, and apart from a few fish dishes, every item on the menu is vegetarian.

Grab a seat at the counter if you want breakfast and a show, as the lightning-quick culinary choreography of the chefs at B&H Dairy rivals performances at Lincoln Center. The staff here are like a family, and they work hard, so please tip well.

bandhdairykosher.com
(212) 505-8065
127 2nd Ave, New York, NY 10003

Fletcher Huntley / Mashed

The last time I ate at Landmark Diner in SoHo, after I paid, the server picked up the check and examined it. "How much did you tip me?" she asked. I laughed so hard that coffee came out of my nose.

That's all to say, if you're going to eat at Landmark, do not expect to be treated like royalty, or even landed gentry. This diner stakes perhaps the last claim that exists in SoHo of some gritty New York past, real or imagined. The breakfast specials are as simple as they are affordable, with two eggs, hash browns, toast, tea or coffee, and a breakfast meat of your choice, clocking in at about the same price as a single bowl of soup at some of the neighborhood's more Instagrammable eateries.

The coffee is weak and plentiful (as diner coffee should be), and even though the staff treats you with that characteristically brutal New York love, I've never been rushed out the door. Pro tip: If you're having the winter blues, come around 9:30 a.m. and grab a table on the side of the restaurant that faces Centre Street. Warm light pours in through the plate glass windows, and you can close your eyes and, for a moment, imagine you're on a tropical beach, which really takes your omelet to the next level.

landmarkdiner.restaurant
(212) 334-0040
158 Grand St, New York, NY 10013

Fletcher Huntley / Mashed

Even though I've lived in New York City for fifteen years, I still make the mistake of ending up in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, from time to time. Luckily, there's an easy remedy: walk to Greenpoint. Specifically, go to Three Decker Diner on Manhattan Avenue, where you'll find some of the fluffiest pancakes this great city has to offer.

When I learned that ownership of this light-drenched corner eatery changed hands a few years ago, I was terrified I'd be priced out of my favorite kielbasa and eggs, a dish that reflects the neighborhood's plentiful Polish food options. The new owners also own Variety Coffee, the retro-chic café with locations across Brooklyn and Manhattan, so if you order a cup of joe at Three Decker, it'll be brewed with Variety beans. The menu also got a makeover featuring cute illustrations and saturated colors, but much of the same food remains, as do the prices.

I'm typically a breakfast-all-day guy, and my favorite menu item when I'm feeling particularly peckish is "The Big Man," which comes with two eggs, two pancakes, and a side of bacon, ham, or sausage. If you go with a friend, grab a booth in the main dining room (the one in the back has bad feng shui) and be sure to split a side of pancakes. Lines can get long, especially on weekends, so get there early and spend the afternoon digesting in McCarren Park or walking along the East River.

threedeckerdiner.com
(718) 389-6664
695 Manhattan Ave, Brooklyn, NY 11222