Why Your Spouse Can't Be Your Only Friend - PLUS Marriage Devotional

Just as you know you can't be there for everybody all the time, the same goes for your spouse. If they are a husband, father, coworker, ministry leader, handyman, soccer coach, etc., how can they be available to you 24/7? If they are wife, mom, coworker, Sunday School teacher, classroom mom, cheerleading coach, etc., what does it say of you to demand all their time and energy? Not only is this impossible, but it's not fair to expect your life partner to be God.

They cannot be omnipresent, which is why God sends us community.

No matter your life season, consider a few areas where you might discover rich friendships:

-If you don't have kiddos yet, find a life group at your church that supports newlyweds. This is a sweet way to find like-minded young couples. Bonus points for a life group that communicates consistently throughout the week and gets together for life's fun little moments!

-If you're a young parent, many churches offer a parents' night out each semester. This allows you to meet and mingle with other parents during drop-off and pick-up.

Often, creating adult friendships post-children feels a bit like speed dating. There's little time (and sanity), everyone feels tired, and no one knows if they're being judged by the snacks they give their kiddo. But this is when you step out in faith, allowing God to bring the right people into your life at the right time. And what better season of life than the early years of parenthood to have other moms and dads to support you in those diaper and tantrum trenches?

-If you have a particular hobby, don't underestimate the number of local clubs/groups in your niche. (Facebook is a great place to start your search!) This is a great way for you and your spouse to make other friends and invest in what brings you joy. My husband has a group of golf buddies he meets for mini-tournaments at our local course. I have a group of mom friends that get together to discuss motherhood and writing while sipping on our "mommy fun drinks." Maybe you should join a book club, take painting classes, or volunteer at your town's community garden.

-If you're empty nesters, it's time to find some travel buddies and fellow adventurers to knock out all those fun experiences you planned but never got around to. Find a church small group catered to your life season, sign up for a local dance class, take a rock-climbing class, etc. When you don't have to worry about a car seat or bedtime, the fun only stops when you and your new buddies want it to!

If God didn't find friendships so valuable, He wouldn't have called us His friends. There's an intimacy in friendships among believers, a bond that runs deeper than any common interest or life season. These relationships, like your marriage, are there to cover you in God's promises and offer you glimpses of His unending joy.

Prayer:

God, may I intentionally seek friendships that will keep me tethered to you. Grant me the courage to branch out, try new things, and meet new people so I can enjoy the well-rounded blessing of both marriage and friendship with others. Help me to humbly remember that my spouse can't carry every burden, and that you have blessed me with other believers I can lean on, too. Thank you for choosing to call me your friend. Your love and intimacy are unmatched. In your holy name, I pray, amen.

Discussion Questions: What unfair expectations have you placed on your spouse? In what areas could you lean further into the support and encouragement of friends?

Peyton Garland is an author, editor, and boy mama who lives in the beautiful foothills of East Tennessee. Subscribe to her blog Uncured+Okay for more encouragement.

We hope you and your spouse are challenged and encouraged by today's devotional! For more of this premium marriage devotional, visit here.